How to Have Hard Conversations

Hard conversations are the worst. Very few of us want to have them. Most of us avoid them. Really, who likes stepping into that awkward space? I might rather have a root canal without painkiller.

But here's the thing about hard conversations: they are essential. We need them, and the better we are at them, the more freedom we will have.

Hard conversations can be more comfortable when we remember these three truths.

Truth#1: People Respect Honesty

Even when the truth hurts, deep down, people respect others who are willing to be honest. The truth can be a difficult pill to swallow, but it is easier when you know that the person delivering it is being real. We have lost "real" in today's filtered, Insta-worthy world. So much is embellished and doctored that we long for authentic.

Truth #2: It Is Okay to Disappoint People

As a recovering people pleaser, I struggle with this truth the most. I am great with being real, but disappointing people? No. Thank. You. It took years for me to learn proper boundaries. It also took years to understand that while it is my job to be kind, it is not my job to manage other people's feelings. If I had known how much freedom there is in letting go, I would have done it so much earlier. Let people manage their own emotions. The cost of carrying everyone else's is too high.

Truth #3: Hard Conversations Free You from Bondage

As long as we are stuffing feelings and avoiding necessary conversations, we are stuck. We are relationally shackled. The conflict with the person we are avoiding is actually robbing us of our energy, our power, and our emotional freedom. When we speak the truth in love, we get our power back, which frees us to love the other person where she is.

Let your words be kind. Let them be loving. But, let them be true.

You are amazing! Now start living like it!